SALLY: Oh, Cecil? (GIGGLE) Cecil? Well, where ARE you? CECIL: Right here, behind the door. SALLY: Oh. (GIGGLE) Well, it's all over, isn't it? CECIL: W-well, you see, it's like this, Sally... SALLY: Cecil Shortridge. You broke the string. CECIL: Well, whattaya know about that? It broke. SALLY: Well, you KNOW it did. You broke it. CECIL: Well, I wasn't ready. I didn't have time to holler, "Stop", so I... just grabbed the string, and broke it. SALLY: Oh, goodness. Now we have to do it all over. CECIL: Oh, no we don't. SALLY: Why? Did the tooth fall out anyhow? CECIL: N-no, but... I've decided to let it stay in there a little while longer. SALLY: And I've decided that you've been acting like a baby, long enough. CECIL: You can't tell me what to do. SALLY: And why can't I tell you what to do? CECIL: Well, you can tell me, but I don't have to listen. SALLY: You know what I'm going to do, Cecil? CECIL: Sure. You're gonna call me an overgrown baby. But I don't care. I don't want-- That is, I'm not quite ready to yank it out yet. SALLY: Well, when WILL you be ready? CECIL: Oh, in about... about ten minutes. Maybe. SALLY: If you don't tie that string to the doorknob again, and get this over with, I'm going right to the phone. CECIL: What are you gonna do, throw the phone at me? SALLY: No. I'll phone up your aunt and tell her that you're over here at my house with a loose tooth in your mouth, and you ought to go to the dentist. SHE won't fool with you. CECIL: She'll tell you to mind your own business. SALLY: Oh, she will not. Well, I'm going. CECIL: All right. SALLY: A dentist won't be so quick as this. Well... I'll be right back. CECIL: Are you gonna be a tattletale? SALLY: Are you going to be a baby? CECIL: My aunt isn't home. SALLY: Well, I'll take a chance. CECIL: Hey, wait a minute! Huh! I was only playing. Huh, I wouldn't go all the way downtown, you know, just to have a dentist p-push a loose tooth out. Huh! Why, I just wanted to wait a few minutes. SALLY: Oh, you just don't wanna have to be such a coward in front of other people. I know. CECIL: Huh! Why, this is nothing. SALLY: All right, then. Tie those two strings together again. CECIL: (BEAT) All right. (TYING STRINGS TOGETHER) Such and... such. Huh. SALLY: Don't be so slow, Cecil. Tie them good and tight. CECIL: We've got all afternoon. SALLY: (GIGGLE) Oh, Cecil, you look so funny. (GIGGLE) CECIL: You'd look funny too, with a string leading out of your mouth. SALLY: All right. Are you all ready again? CECIL: Wait a minute. Let's see. SALLY: (GIGGLE) Are you looking for an excuse? CECIL: All right. Get on the other side of the door. SALLY: Now, stand right here. And don't break the string at the last moment. CECIL: All right. You and your torture chamber... SALLY: Oh, if you weren't such a coward, you'd reach in and pull it out with your fingers. CECIL: Yeah. And if this were YOUR tooth, you wouldn't talk so much. SALLY: Are you all set, now? CECIL: No! SALLY: Well, why aren't you? CECIL: (BEAT) I've gotta cross my fingers. SALLY: Are you ready now? CECIL: (BEAT) No! Don't be in such a hurry. SALLY: Come on, Cecil. Be a man. CECIL: And you be yourself, willya? SALLY: Well, what are you doing? CECIL: (BEAT) I'm bracing myself. SALLY: Well? Are you braced now? CECIL: (BEAT) No! I'll tell you when I'm ready! SALLY: Well, we only have about six more hours of daylight. CECIL: Well, wait a minute. Are you gonna count? SALLY: No. When you say you're ready, I'll just pull the door shut quick. CECIL: Well, I'm not ready yet. SALLY: Oh, Cecil, stop stalling. What's the matter? CECIL: Sh-sh-shall I close my eyes? SALLY: Yes. Shall I shut the door now? CECIL: No! Wait a minute. I-I-- uh... (VOICE CRACKS) Couldn't we do this later? SALLY: No. We're gonna do it right now! SFX: DOOR SLAM ... PAUSE CECIL: Hey, I didn't say I was ready! SALLY: Oh, Cecil, it's still in! CECIL: Sure. I-I wasn't standing back far enough for the string to pull. SALLY: Goodness, am I gonna have to CHLOROFORM you? CECIL: Well, I-- That's not a bad idea. SALLY: Oh, I thought it would be all over by now. CECIL: Well, that's what you get for trying to take me by surprise. SALLY: All right, I'll wait until you say you're ready, this time. CECIL: All right. Go on back in the other room. SALLY: Now, stand straight up, and take up the slack. CECIL: Leave the door open about a foot, so you'll have room to pull... SALLY: Don't you bother about me. Are you ready? CECIL: Will you stop asking me, am I ready? SALLY: Cecil, please hurry. There's no reason to wait. CECIL: There is too! I have to collect my thoughts. SALLY: Well, that shouldn't take long. You have so few. CECIL: And no dirty remarks! Oh, and another thing... SALLY: Well, what's wrong now? CECIL: I don't like the way you open that door again and laugh. SALLY: All right. Are you all set? CECIL: No! Not quite. Uh... Uh, do you think this'll hurt, Sally? SALLY: Oh, you won't feel it! CECIL: Ha! Don't make me laugh. Well... SALLY: Are you ever going to say you're ready? CECIL: Well, uh... Wait til I open my mouth. SALLY: Have you got it open? CECIL: (MOUTH OPEN) Yeah. SALLY: Are you ready? CECIL: (BEAT) Yeah. (SUDDENLY) No, wait a minute! SALLY: Oh, what's wrong? CECIL: I was standing wrong. (BEAT) All right. I'm ready. But take it easy, now. SALLY: All right. Get set. CECIL: (SUDDENLY) Wait a minute, Sally! Not yet! SALLY: Oh, my goodness... All right. CECIL: (VOICE CRACKS) Well, there's no hurry. We got lots of time. SALLY: Oh, Cecil, don't be such a coward. Get it over. CECIL: All right. Well... I guess I'm ready, then. SALLY: Are you sure, this time? CECIL: Uh... Yeah, I think so. Oh, gosh... SALLY: All right, then. In just a second, it'll be out. CECIL: Hey, Sally, don't! Wait! SALLY: Oh, Cecil, I was just about to pull the door. CECIL: I know. I was afraid of that. I-- You know, I-- Oh, I just thought, uh, well, uh... You don't mind doing this, do you? SALLY: No. All right, now. Are you ready? CECIL: Well, that's good, because... i-if this was any bother to you... I wouldn't want you to do it. SALLY: Are you all set again? CECIL: I-I wouldn't wanna put you to any trouble on my account, because, well... it'll probably fall out tonight, anyhow. SALLY: I tell you, it's a pleasure. Are you ready? CECIL: Well... yes. I just wanted to know, you know. Well, I'm, uh, I'm ready. SALLY: Well, don't change your mind. SFX: DOOR SLAM SALLY: That's right. (GIGGLE) Cecil, see? It didn't hurt at all, did it? All it takes is just one little pull, and presto! (GASP) Cecil, it isn't out yet. CECIL: Well, you see, Sally, you waited so long before you shut the door, that I sorta took a little step forward, and... then, when you shut the door, why, it didn't take up the slack in the string, so (NERVOUS LITTLE LAUGH) isn't that funny? SALLY: All right then, let it stay in. I don't care. Swallow it, and die. It'll serve you right for being such a baby. CECIL: Well, I'll let it stay in, a little while longer. (NERVOUS LITTLE LAUGH) Then, I'll pull it out. SALLY: Oh, I'm disgusted with you. I'm ashamed of you. And I thought you were brave. CECIL: Now, Sally, don't get peeved. Just because you waited too long. Now I've gotta untie this string from my tooth. (DOES IT) Ouch! SALLY: Oh, why don't you pull it out? CECIL: There. (EXHALES) Now it's untied. Well... let's get out of the kitchen. SALLY: Here, BABY. Give me that string. I'll put it back in the kitchen drawer. CECIL: W-well, Sally, gee. You should feel sorry for me, instead o' ribbing me about it. It's liable to hurt. You don't know. SALLY: Oh, keep still! You're liable to break down and cry! Oh, goodness, what's this? CECIL: Looks like that precious cook o' yours spilt pepper outta the pepper box, all in the drawer. SALLY: Oh, goodness. That's just what it is. Pepper. Well, how will I get it out? CECIL: Here. Get outta the way. I can do SOME things. SALLY: What are you going to do? CECIL: I'm gonna blow this pepper out. That's the only way. Now, watch out for your eyes. (BLOWS) SALLY: Ooh! Watch out for your nose, Cecil! You'll get some in your nose! CECIL: (PEPPER UP NOSE) I already did! I-- (PREPARING TO SNEEZE) Ah-- ah-- SALLY: Well, what are you going to do? Sneeze? CECIL: Yeah. Watch out. I'm rehearsing. (PREPARING TO SNEEZE) Ah-- ah-- SALLY: (GIGGLE) Go ahead and sneeze. CECIL: (BIG SNEEZE) Oh. (LITTLE LAUGH) My nose itches. SALLY: Cecil... (GIGGLE) Oh, my goodness. (GIGGLE) CECIL: What's funny? SALLY: Well, look. My goodness, look on the table, Cecil. See? When you sneezed... CECIL: What is it? (LOOKS) Why, it's a tooth! How'd it get there? Whose is it? SALLY: (GIGGLE) My goodness, it's YOURS. It came out when you sneezed. CECIL: It's mine??? Let's see. (FEELS IN MOUTH WITH HIS TONGUE) Ye gods, it's gone! It's mine! (IN PAIN) Oh, it hurts, Sally! Gimme some water, quick! SALLY: (GIGGLE) If I hadn't said something, you'd never have known the difference. (GIGGLE) I knew all I had to do was to jar you, and it would come out. I spilt that pepper on purpose, and you took it, hook, line, and sinker! (GIGGLE)