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Series: Uncle Sam's Forest Rangers
Show: Episode 34 - Foolish Questions
Date: Sep 15 1932

CAST
ANNOUNCER
ELLSWORTH, supervisor
JERRY, Ranger Jim's assistant
MRS. BLAKESLEE, crabby
BESS, Ranger Jim's wife
VISITOR

12:30 to 1:30 P.M, C.D.S.T. SEPTEMBER 15, 1932 THURSDAY

ORCHESTRA:

QUARTETTE

ANNOUNCER:

We take you now to the national forest, where Ranger Jim Robbins is in charge of the Pine Cone District, and with his young assistant, Jerry Quick, is looking after the welfare of the forest resources in the public interest. One of the major forest resources is the opportunity for healthful outdoor recreation. Hiking, picnicking, camping, mountain climbing, hunting, fishing, and nature study are recreational activities which thousands of visitors to the national forests enjoy. There is no charge for entering the national forests, and the U. S. Forest Service asks of its visitors only that they observe the few simple regulations, particularly as to sanitation and care with fire. -- Today, as we tune in on the Pine Cone Ranger District, we find Supervisor Ellsworth and Jerry inspecting one of the so-called "special use" areas, where a number of families have put up summer cabins on sites leased under permit from the Forest Service. Jim Robbins is away on a trip this week, so the Supervisor and Jerry are carrying on the work.

JERRY:

Where are you going now, Mr. Ellsworth?

ELLSWORTH:

I think we'd better have a look at the water supply, Jerry.

JERRY:

Okay. Gosh, it'11 sure be a relief to get off by ourselves a while. All we've been hearing all morning is foolish questions from the tourists and summer home permittees.

ELLSWORTH:

They sound foolish to us, Jerry, - but what sort of questions would you ask a sailor - on an ocean liner, for instance?

JERRY:

(laughing) He'd spot me for a land-lubber all right.

ELLSWORTH:

Yep, I reckon we all act dumb when we get off our own stamping grounds. I remember one time I was in Chicago I stopped a man and asked him how to get to the post office, and there I was standing right in front of it.

JERRY:

What did he say?

ELLSWORTH:

He gave me the same kind of look you gave that girl who asked you if forest rangers ever get thrown off their horses.

JERRY:

(chuckles) Well, some of these folks do ask such silly questions. One girl stopped me the other day when I was coming out of the store at Winding Creek, and she pointed at my badge and said "Say, Mr. Ranger, what does that U. S. stand for?"

ELLSWORTH:

(laughs) Did it ever occur to you that the young lady maybe wanted to get a real close up of a handsome sunburned young forest ranger?

JERRY:

Aw, shucks, what're you giving us?

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) Well, here's where we draw the water supply for the Forks tourist campground, Jerry. The summer home permittees in this area get their drinking water here too. -- Hmm -- The Creek shows the effects of that big fire we had, all right.

JERRY:

What do you think, Mr. Ellsworth? Are we going to have to develop a new water supply?

ELLSWORTH:

I'm afraid we will, Jerry. With the forest cover burned off up where it protects the headwaters of our little creek here, it's going to run muddy after every rain now, until we can get new forest growth started -- and that'll take several years.

JERRY:

I guess the summer home folks won't mind using the spring up the road, - temporarily, at least.

ELLSWORTH:

They'll have to use it for their drinking water, for the time being - but it's quite a ways for 'em to have to carry water.

JERRY:

Well, that's something else we can charge up against the fire. -- Doggone! A forest fire sure can cause a lot of trouble.

ELLSWORTH:

Yep. Folks around here'll be feeling the effects of that fire on Bald Mountain for years to come, Jerry.

JERRY:

I guess they will.

ELLSWORTH:

It might have been a lot worse, though. We did pretty well to stop it where we did - with the wind whipping 'er up that way.

JERRY:

I'll say so. It sure had me worried for a while.

ELLSWORTH:

Yep. --- The greatest damage from that fire, Jerry, was the loss in watershed values -- burning up the forest cover that helps regulate the flow of water from that drainage. -- And water is life -- besides coming in handy now and then to wash your face in.

JERRY:

Yeah. It does come in handy for that. I think I'll wash a little sweat off here in the creek right now.

ELLSWORTH:

Go to it, son. We're below the water supply intake.

JERRY:

(SOUND OF SPLASHING) Boy! It's still plenty cold! - There. Now, if I can get my handkerchief outa my pocket for a towel --

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) If you'd taken your handkerchief out before you started, you wouldn't've had to reach in your pocket with your wet hand now - and you'd've demonstrated the advantage of careful planning as a basis for operations.

JERRY:

(laughs) That's right. -- Well, it feels good anyhow. Cools you off a lot.

ELLSWORTH:

Yeah. I was just saying water comes in handy. -- You know, our research men in the Forest Service have been doing a lot of experimenting and study on this matter of conserving water supplies and stopping erosion or soil-washing.

JERRY:

Yes, I know. I've seen some of the reports.

ELLSWORTH:

And in one place, they measured the run-off of rainwater from a plot of ground that had been burned over, and from another plot that still had a good forest cover, with all the leaf litter on the ground ---

JERRY:

What did they find out?

ELLSWORTH:

Well, they found that there was from 15 to 20 times as much rainfall ran off and was lost from the burned-over plot as there was from the plot with the forest on it.

JERRY:

Gee, that's quite a difference.

ELLSWORTH:

Yes. And when they dug down in the ground in the barren, burned-over plot, they found that the water was only soaking in a little way. But when they dug down under the litter in the forest-covered plot, they could see that the water was soaking right in -- and their measurements showed that the forest-covered plot had soaked up a lot more tons of rain to the acre than the burned-over land.

JERRY:

Well, that shows how the forests help store up water and feed it out gradually, all right.

ELLSWORTH:

Yes, and it shows what happens when the forest cover burns off. - Well, here comes one of our summer home permittees.

JERRY:

Say, look at that parasol she's carrying! -- Who is she?

ELLSWORTH:

That's Mrs. Blakeslee. She's the one that was complaining a few weeks ago about her neighbor chopping wood too early in the morning.

JERRY:

Oh, yes. I remember.

ELLSWORTH:

I reckon we'll probably hear some more fussing and foolish questions, now. --- (raising voice) Good morning, Mrs. Blakeslee.

MRS. BLAKESLEE:

(coming up, crabby) Look here, sir. Our water is muddy. It's been muddy most of the time lately.

ELLSWORTH:

Yes, I know, Mrs. Blakeslee. You see, that's because the big fire we had up on Bald Mountain burned off the forest that protected the headwaters of our creek here.

MRS. B:

(crabby) Oh, it is, eh? Well, you rangers shouldn't have let it burn off.

JERRY:

(huffy) Sa-ay - what do you think we were doing up on that fire -- fighting night and day without any sleep -- and everything?

MRS. B:

You should have put it out.

JERRY:

We did put it out.

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) I reckon you better be pretty thankful we got it stopped when we did, Mrs. Blakeslee. If we hadn't, it would've kept right on this way and burned out your summer home and all the rest of the cabins in this area.

MRS. B:

Well, you ought to keep such fires from starting in the first place.

ELLSWORTH:

We've been trying to do that for twenty-five years, Mrs. Blakeslee, -- and we're still trying. If you could suggest a quicker way to teach people to be more careful with fire, we'd sure be grateful.

MRS. B:

They all ought to be put in jail.

ELLSWORTH:

Maybe so. -- That reminds me, Mrs. Blakeslee -- I have a note in my book to call your attention to the fact that I noticed you'd been burning trash too close to that old dead log back of your house.

MRS. B:

I have?

ELLSWORTH:

Yes, and if that log got to smoldering and a heavy wind come up it might scatter sparks all over the place. Fires start that way sometimes.

MRS. B:

They do?

ELLSWORTH:

Yes'm. And we certainly don't want the woods around here to get on fire, 'cause if they did, your cabin would be sure to burn up too.

MRS. B:

Well, why didn't you say something about this before? You'd have let my cabin burn up without doing a thing.

ELLSWORTH:

Not if we could help it, ma'am. You see, your camp-site permit carries with it certain conditions about care with fire. I thought you'd be familiar with 'em.

JERRY:

(slyly) And what was it you said they ought to do with people that're careless with fire?

MRS. B:

Look here, young man. Don't you try to insinuate that I'm careless about fire. - Who is this young man, Mr. Ranger?

ELLSWORTH:

He's the assistant, Mr. Quick -- assistant to your ranger - Jim Robbins.

MRS. B:

Well, he's very impertinent. -- And I'm sure he is the one who makes all the noise with that siren on the fire truck.

JERRY:

No ma'am. Not guilty this time.

MRS. B:

Why can't you have them run their siren more quietly? It's very disturbing.

ELLSWORTH:

Well, you see, Mrs. Blakeslee, when the truck's going to a fire, it goes at a pretty good clip, and I reckon it's best to let other folks know it's coming.

MRS. B:

Well, it's the most annoying thing I ever heard. Why can't you have it go some other way when it goes to a fire?

ELLSWORTH:

We have to send it the quickest way possible, Mrs. Blakeslee.

MRS. B:

Well, I suppose I'll have to put up with it. But I wish you would change that telephone line that runs by my place.

ELLSWORTH:

What's the matter with it?

MRS. B:

I don't like it.

ELLSWORTH:

Oh, I see.

MRS. B:

And it's right in the way of my view of Cloud Peak.

ELLSWORTH:

Well, now, that's a shame.

MRS. B:

Why can't you move it over by the Dalton's cabin?

ELLSWORTH:

I'm afraid we'll have to leave it where it is, Mrs. Blakeslee. We used a lot of care in picking out where it was to go, and that's the best route for it.

MRS. B:

I'm sure it would do just as well if it went by the Dalton's cabin. -- Oh, and I've been intending to speak to you about this too. Have you noticed how Mr. Dalton's wife runs around?

ELLSWORTH:

No. Can't say that I have.

MRS. B:

Well, I wouldn't say a word if she wasn't one of my best friends, but I think you should speak to Mr. Dalton about it. I really think you should.

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) Well, I'm afraid that's a little outside my province, Mrs. Blakeslee -- even if I am the forest supervisor. But to get back to this water supply business -- I guess you'll have to get your husband to carry drinking water from the spring up the road till we can get it piped down here.

MRS. B:

I certainly shall not!

ELLSWORTH:

Well, I reckon that's about the easiest way to get it, unless you want to have water hauled up from town.

MRS. B:

But I can't allow my husband to carry water that far. I have to watch his health very carefully -- and besides, it's -- well, it's rather degrading -- carrying water in a bucket.

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) Well, I never felt that way when I carried water, -- and I have a sort of feeling, Mrs. Blakeslee, that your husband would enjoy it -- and it'd be good for him.

MRS. B:

Well, I suppose we'll have to put up with it.

ELLSWORTH:

That's just it. Look here, Mrs. Blakeslee. You've got the wrong slant altogether --

MRS. B:

Sir!

ELLSWORTH:

You've got the wrong idea of a summer outing. Most folks come up here just for the opportunity - for the privilege - of putting up with things like that. They come up here for a change, and it's things like carrying water and chopping their own wood that make it a change from the way they're used to living. You see, they come up here expecting to find things different, and they're ready to put up with it - and not only that, but to get all the fun they can out of it.

MRS. B:

Well, I never heard such --

ELLSWORTH:

(cutting in) Now you take this young Mrs. Dalton you were talking about - she's having the time of her life - riding and hiking and playing with the kids and working with the men - and it doesn't mean a thing except that she knows how to make the most of her summer outing.

MRS. B:

It's a scandal the way she carries on, and ---

ELLSWORTH:

Now you take my advice, Mrs. Blakeslee, and go back and give that husband of yours a couple of water buckets, and let him take off his coat - and I bet he'll have the time of his life.

MRS. B:

I certainly will not!

ELLSWORTH:

And you ought to try carrying a bucket or two yourself, Mrs. Blakeslee. It'd be good for you.

MRS. B:

Sir! I'll not listen to such talk any longer! Good day.

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) So long, Mrs. Blakeslee.

JERRY:

Gosh! She sure can take the joy out a life — can't she?

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) She means all right, Jerry. She just has to get a few kicks out of her system now and then, so's she'll feel better. Come on, boy, let's get lined up on where we want to run this new pipe line.

JERRY:

All right. -- (going off) Gosh! We've had enough funny questions and everything already now to last us a month --

(MUSICAL INTERLUDE)

(SOUND OF DOOR)

ELLSWORTH:

(coming up) Well, I guess Mrs. Robbins is in the sitting room, Jerry.

JERRY:

Yeah. She didn't expect me back to the Station so early. (calls) Oh, Mrs. Robbins!

BESS:

(off) Yes? -- (coming up) Back already? Oh, hell-o, Mr. Ellsworth. I told Jerry to bring you back with him.

ELLSWORTH:

Well, I did! How did the day go here at the station Mrs. Robbins? Anything happen?

BESS:

Oh, nothing special, Mr. Ellsworth, except that Mr. Warner - one of Jim's sheep permittees, you know - called up and complained that Mr. Pringle's herders were letting their sheep run over on his grazing allotment.

ELLSWORTH:

Better make a note to speak to Pringle's herders about that, Jerry.

JERRY:

Okay. And I'll tell Jim I took care of it.

BESS:

And then there were a lot of telephone calls - mostly tourists asking questions.

JERRY:

Huh? That's all we've been getting today up on the summer home area - One crazy question after another.

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) This must be "foolish question day". What was botherin' 'em, Mrs. Robbins?

BESS:

Well, one man called up and wanted to know if it was all right to feed the bears that come around the campground. I told him he'd better not let them eat out of his hand, if he had any future need for the hand.

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) That's good.

BESS:

And another tourist stopped by, and got mad because Jim wasn't here at the Station. He said the Ranger ought to stay where he could answer questions.

ELLSWORTH:

(chuckles) I've often thought that a ranger would get along a lot better on this job if he was twins - or triplets, maybe.

BESS:

I couldn't find out that he wanted anything specially, though. I offered to help him any way I could. -- And then there were several other people stopped by, and a lot of phone calls -- about little things -- but I think I got everybody satisfied.

(PHONE RINGS)

JERRY:

There's the phone again now. I'll get it. -- I bet it's another funny question (TO PHONE) Hello. Pine Cone Ranger Station. -- Yes ma'm. -- Huh? -- Oh. -- Well, just a minute, please -- (TO OTHERS) That's Mrs. Duval, one of the summer cabin people. She says there's a great big lizard in her cabin and she wants the Ranger to come up and get it out.

ELLSWORTH:

(LAUGHING) Tell 'er to take a broom to it!

JERRY:

(TO PHONE) Hello -- Yes, Mrs. Duval -- Why don't you try taking a broom, and -- Oh -- Well, all right. Goodbye. (HANGS UP RECEIVER) -- (TO ELLSWORTH) She says the lizard's gone now anyhow.

ELLSWORTH:

(Chuckles) Probably it was the scaredest one of the two.

JERRY:

(disgusted) Say, this is getting on my nerves! I s'pose it's a Ranger's duty to shoo lizards out of people's cabins, huh?

ELLSWORTH:

It's a Ranger's duty to listen patiently to people's troubles and questions and help the visitors to his Forest any way he can, Jerry. --

BESS:

Someone's coming up on the front porch, I wonder --

ELLSWORTH: Sure enough. -- He looks kinda serious, -- doesn't he? -- Like he had something on his mind.

JERRY:

I bet he's going to ask some crazy question or crab about something, too.

BESS:

Yes, or another impossible request, I suppose.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

VISITOR:

(OFF) Say, Ranger --

ELLSWORTH:

Yes sir, come in, sir.

VISITOR:

(coming up) Are you the Ranger in charge here?

ELLSWORTH:

No, the ranger's away for a couple a days. But I'm the supervisor.

VISITOR:

Well, I've been traveling over your National Forest here, and I stopped at your Bigtree Campground.

ELLSWORTH:

Yes, sir. Anything wrong?

VISITOR:

And I want to compliment you fellows on the excellent way you're managing this Forest --

ELLSWORTH:

Well, now, thank you, sir -- (chuckles)

BESS:

(With him) Oh, won't you sit down, Mr. ---

JERRY:

(With them) Say, have a chair, won't you --

(FADEOUT WITH ALL TALKING AT ONCE)

ANNOUNCER:

Well, I guess it wasn't such a bad day for Jerry after all. -- It's a hard job to satisfy everybody all of the time, but Uncle Sam's Forest Rangers are always endeavoring to look after the welfare of their forest visitors as best they can and to render efficient and disinterested public service at all times. In the management of the National Forests they have constantly before them the ideal of "the greatest good to the great number".

Tune in Thursday after next at this same hour for another look-in on Ranger Jim and Jerry. "Uncle Sam's Forest Rangers" comes to you as a presentation of the National Broadcasting Company, with the cooperation of the Forest Service, United States Department of Agriculture.