Generic Radio Workshop Script Library (BACK)

Series: The Screen Guild Theater
Show: The Shop Around the Corner
Date: Sep 29 1940

Screen Guild Theater
The Shop Around the Corner
Sep 29 1940


VOICE:

Margaret Sullavan. James Stewart. Frank Morgan.

MUSIC:

FANFARE

ANNOUNCER:

The Gulf Screen Guild Theater!

MUSIC:

FANFARE

ANNOUNCER:

Your host and director of the stars' own theater, Roger Pryor!

MUSIC:

THEME ... CONTINUES IN BG ... OUT AT [X]

SOUND:

APPLAUSE ... THEN OUT

HOST:

Good evening, everyone. On behalf of your neighborhood Good Gulf dealer and the Gulf Oil Companies, welcome back to the Gulf Screen Guild Theater. Right now, the Gulf Theater is the most exciting place this Hollywood of ours has seen in months. Out front in the audience are many of the greatest names in motion pictures and radio. Right beside me here on the stage are Margaret Sullavan, James Stewart and Frank Morgan, whom you'll hear later in tonight's play "The Shop Around the Corner." Behind me, of course, is Oscar Bradley's Gulf Orchestra with Frank Tours conducting. [X] And facing me across the microphone is one of the grandest fellows in Hollywood or anyplace else, a great actor and the president of the Motion Picture Relief Fund, Jean Hersholt. Jean has something to say to you.

SOUND:

APPLAUSE ... THEN OUT

HERSHOLT:

Ladies and gentlemen, the Gulf Screen Guild Theater means more to us here in Hollywood than you probably realize. Soon, just outside of Hollywood, a community, complete in itself, will be built -- a community that will provide a home for the less fortunate men and women of the motion picture industry who because of some quirk of fate can no longer provide for themselves. And we owe all this to the Gulf Theater, for the money that would ordinarily go to the stars who appear here, Gulf gives instead to the Motion Picture Relief Fund. So, as we start our third season, I want to thank the Gulf people and all the stars who have helped make the Gulf Theater our theater. I'm proud to be associated with them. Thank you.

SOUND:

APPLAUSE ... THEN OUT

HOST:

Thank you, Jean Hersholt. And now ladies and gentlemen, for our first production of the season, we bring you Margaret Sullavan, James Stewart and Frank Morgan in "The Shop Around the Corner."

MUSIC:

FOR AN INTRODUCTION ... JEROME KERN'S "A FINE ROMANCE" ... THEN IN BG

MATUSCHEK:

Heh, heh. Well, well, "The Shop Around the Corner" they call this story, and do you know who's shop? Matuschek and Company, novelties and leather wear! Best of its kind in Budapest. It really is. Wonderful values at all times. In fact, I don't know how Matuschek and Company does it.

HOST:

Er, just a moment, please. Who are you?

MATUSCHEK:

Er, who? Me? Well-- (SNORTS) I'm Matuschek!

HOST:

Oh.

MATUSCHEK:

Yes. Well, anyhow it all happened in my store. Practically all. That's why I'm telling it. Well, this is the story of two young people of whom I am very fond, Klara and Martin. Klara is very attractive. Yes. She's most attractive. And, uh, an excellent sales girl. But Martin and Klara haven't gotten on at all from the very first day she came to work for me. Professional jealousy on Martin's part because no head clerk likes to have an assistant, especially such a pretty assistant, outsell him.

MUSIC:

OUT

SOUND:

CASH REGISTER ... FOR PUNCTUATION

MARTIN:

Oh, Miss Novak, what ever became of those musical cigarette boxes that nobody ever buys?

KLARA:

(BRIGHTLY) I just sold the last one, Mr. Martin.

MARTIN:

(DISAPPOINTED) Oh.

SOUND:

CASH REGISTER

MARTIN:

Can I show you something, madam?

WOMAN (BRIGHTLY) Oh, no thank you, I prefer to have the young lady wait on me.

MARTIN:

(DISAPPOINTED) Oh.

SOUND:

CASH REGISTER

MARTIN:

Well, I've had a pretty good day. My sales come to exactly a hundred and seventy-six kronen.

KLARA:

(BRIGHTLY) Mmm. My sales come to two hundred and fifty kronen.

MARTIN:

(DISAPPOINTED) Oh.

MUSIC:

WRY ACCENT ... THEN IN BG

MATUSCHEK:

Yes, you, er, you can easily see how these little occurrences would hardly make for a beautiful friendship. But all this didn't seem very important to Martin these days. He had something else on his mind. Martin was living in a romantic plane, far above the everyday routine of Matuschek and Company. I found that out one day when I chanced to overhear him talking with a fellow clerk named Pirovitch.

MARTIN:

Wanna hear something nice, Pirovitch?

PIROVITCH:

Yes. What is it?

MARTIN:

It's a letter from a girl. Now, listen. (READS) "My heart was trembling as I walked into the post office. And there you were, lying in Box Two-thirty-seven, and I took you out of your envelope and read you. I read you right there. Oh, Dear Friend--"

PIROVITCH:

Well, what is all this?

MARTIN:

Well, you see I - I was lookin' through the ads in the Sunday paper and I got on the wrong page and I ran across this ad. Here, here, let me show it to you. See?

PIROVITCH:

(READS) "Modern girl wishes to correspond on cultural subjects anonymously with intelligent, sympathetic young man. Address 'Dear Friend.' Post Office Fifteen, Box Two-three-seven."

MARTIN:

Now, we've exchanged four letters. And, Pirovitch, she's no ordinary girl. Now listen to this: (READS) "Are you tall or short? Are your eyes brown? Are they blue? Now, don't tell me. What does it matter so long as our minds meet?"

PIROVITCH:

You're right. It is beautiful, yes.

MARTIN:

Now, listen: "What are men and women for but to rise above the stupid necessities of the eight hour day?"

PIROVITCH:

That sounds very nice, Martin, but you really shouldn't--

MARTIN:

Oh, excuse me, Pirovitch. (CALLS, STERNLY) Ah, Miss Novak, where do you think you're going?

KLARA:

I'm going home, Mr. Martin. It's six o'clock.

MARTIN:

It's five minutes of six. This store does not close for another five minutes. I'm afraid, Miss Novak, that you don't take your work very seriously.

KLARA:

(OFFENDED) Oh, don't I?

MARTIN:

No. No, and I don't like your attitude.

KLARA:

Listen, let me tell you something--

MARTIN:

Yes, and while I think of it, I don't like the clothes you've been wearing in the store. For instance, that yellow blouse with the light green dots you had on yesterday--

KLARA:

That was a green blouse, with light yellow dots. And everybody else thought it was very becoming.

MARTIN:

Yes, yes. Well, I--

KLARA:

And I don't remember that I ever remarked about your neckties. And believe me, Mr. Martin, if you think I couldn't say anything about your neckties-- So I'll thank to leave my blouse alone. It's none of your business.

MARTIN:

Well, I'm very sorry, but Mr. Matuschek seems to think it is my business.

KLARA:

Oh, yes, that's right. I'm working under you. (HEAVY IRONY) Well, from now on I'll telephone you every morning to describe just exactly what I'm going to wear. And before I select my next season's wardrobe, my dressmaker will submit samples for you. (ANNOYED) Imagine, you dictating what I should wear!

MARTIN:

Well, for heaven's sake, I don't care what your wear. If you want to look like a pony in the circus, all right!

KLARA:

(PASSIONATE) Listen, I sold as much goods yesterday as anybody else in the place! A hundred and ninety-seven kronen isn't bad for a rainy Friday three weeks before Christmas! Did you tell that to Mr. Matuschek?!

MARTIN:

I did!

KLARA:

What did he say?!

MARTIN:

He said, "tell her not to come in that blouse anymore."

KLARA:

Tell him I won't!

MARTIN:

I will!

PIROVITCH:

Come, come, come. Always fighting, you two. Why don't you try to get along better?

KLARA:

(MUTTERS) I'd like to know who could get along with a man like him. (CRISPLY, TO MARTIN) Oh, it is now exactly six o'clock, Mr. Martin. May I go?

MARTIN:

Yes, Miss Novak.

KLARA:

Oh ho, thank you very much.

SOUND:

KLARA'S FOOTSTEPS AWAY

MARTIN:

Stubborn little female. I don't know why we ever hired that girl.

PIROVITCH:

Now, don't get yourself all worked up. Calm down.

MARTIN:

Sure, sure. What do I care about a girl like that anyway?

PIROVITCH:

Forget her. Er, tell me more about that girl you've been writing to, you know, "Dear Friend."

MARTIN:

Hm? What? Oh, oh, oh, yeah. (WARMS TO THE SUBJECT) Oh, Pirovitch, she's wonderful. She's-- Well, you know, after a while, in our letters, we came to the subject of love. Well, naturally, on a very cultural level.

PIROVITCH:

What else can you do in a letter?

MARTIN:

Yeah. Yeah, that's right. ... But, Pirovitch, she's the most marvelous girl in the world. She has such ideals; such a point of view on things. Why, she's so far above the girls you meet today, there's - there's simply no comparison.

PIROVITCH:

Mm, you really like her, don't you?

MARTIN:

I hope I will.

PIROVITCH:

What do you mean? You love a girl and you don't know if you like her?

MARTIN:

That's right, Pirovitch, that's just the question. You see, I - I - I haven't met her yet.

PIROVITCH:

You haven't? Wha--? After all this time?

MARTIN:

I've postponed it again and again. I - I'm scared, Pirovitch. You see, this girl thinks I'm the most wonderful person in the world and, after all, there's a chance she might be disappointed.

PIROVITCH:

I see.

MARTIN:

Yes, but tonight I'm taking the risk. I'm meeting her tonight at eight o'clock in a café. She's going to have a copy of Tolstoy's Anna Karenina. And a red carnation for a bookmark. Oh, I haven't slept for days.

PIROVITCH:

I'm sure she'll be beautiful.

MARTIN:

Well, not too beautiful. Oh, what chance would there be for a fellow like me?

PIROVITCH:

What do you want, a homely girl?

MARTIN:

No, no. No, no. No, no. (GENUINELY) Just a - lovely, average girl, that's all.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE ... THEN IN BG, OUT AT [X]

SOUND:

CLOCK CHIMES

MATUSCHEK:

Heh heh. That's, uh, that's the clock in the back of my shop striking eight p. m., and that's exactly the hour Martin was to meet "Dear Friend" for the first time at the café. Well, when the time came, Martin didn't feel quite so brave, so he asked Pirovitch to come along to give him moral support. And even after he got there, he was afraid to go in. [X]

SOUND:

TRAFFIC ON THE STREET

MATUSCHEK:

He stood with Pirovitch in a shadow outside the front window and peered in. He wanted Pirovitch to see if he could spot a girl with a red carnation for a bookmark.

MARTIN:

See anything?

PIROVITCH:

Not yet. Oh, oh, there's a beautiful girl.

MARTIN:

Really?

PIROVITCH:

Very beautiful. But no book.

MARTIN:

Oh, too bad.

PIROVITCH:

Wait - wait a minute. I think I see it. Right here under the window. Yeah. Anna Karenina by Tolstoy. And a carnation.

MARTIN:

Yes, yes? Well, what does she look like?

PIROVITCH:

Well, I can't see her face. She's sitting behind the clothes rack. There's a cup of coffee on the table. She's taking a piece of cake. (AS IF THIS WERE A BAD THING) Martin, she's dunking!

MARTIN:

(CASUAL) Well, why shouldn't she?

PIROVITCH:

(NEVER MIND) Oh, all right.

MARTIN:

What else, Pirovitch? How does she look?

PIROVITCH:

Well, I can't see her face yet. Don't - don't shove me, Martin, I-- Oh, ah. She's leaning forward now. She--

MARTIN:

Well, can you see her?

PIROVITCH:

(UNEASY) Yes.

MARTIN:

Is she pretty?

PIROVITCH:

Very pretty.

MARTIN:

She is, huh?

PIROVITCH:

Er, I would say-- She looks-- She has a little of the coloring of Klara.

MARTIN:

Klara?! Oh, you mean Miss Novak in the shop?

PIROVITCH:

Well, Martin, you - you must admit that Klara is a good-looking girl and - and personally I've always found her a very likable girl.

MARTIN:

Well, this is a fine time to be talking about Miss Novak.

PIROVITCH:

Well, if you don't like Miss Novak, I can tell you right now you won't like this girl.

MARTIN:

Why?

PIROVITCH:

Because it is Miss Novak.

MUSIC:

AN ACCENT, THEN IN BG, OUT AT [X]

MATUSCHEK:

Heh, heh. Well, Martin was all for turning on his heel and starting home, but his friend Pirovitch pointed out that Miss Novak had written those letters, and it really wasn't fair to the girl to leave her waiting there. [X] Much against his will, Martin finally agreed to go inside the café and talk to Miss Novak.

SOUND:

CAFE DOOR OPENS, FOOTSTEPS IN

MUSIC:

CAFE ORCHESTRA, IN BG ... OUT AT [X]

MARTIN:

(PRETENDS SURPRISE) Well! Hello, Miss Novak.

KLARA:

(COOL) Oh. Good evening, Mr. Martin.

MARTIN:

Well, this is quite a coincidence. I had an appointment. You haven't seen Mr. Pirovitch by any chance, have you?

KLARA:

No. No, I haven't.

MARTIN:

Mm hm. Well, I - I guess I'll wait. Mind if I sit down here?

KLARA:

(URGENT) Yes, I do! Please! (FORCED CALM) Oh, Mr. Martin, I - I have an appointment, too.

MARTIN:

Oh. Oh. Well, there's no harm just sitting here, is there? (SIGHS DEEPLY) Oh, I - see you're reading Tolstoy's Anna Karenina.

KLARA:

(ANNOYED) Yes. Anything against it?

MARTIN:

Oh, no, no, no, no. I never expected to meet you in a café with Tolstoy. Heh, that's quite a surprise. I didn't know you went in for the higher literature. [X]

SOUND:

BRIEF APPLAUSE FOR ORCHESTRA, IN BG

KLARA:

Yes? Well, there are so many things you don't know about me, Mr. Martin.

MARTIN:

Mm hm. Mm hm. Have you ever read "Crime and Punishment" by Dostoevsky?

KLARA:

No, I haven't.

MARTIN:

I have. Yeah. Lot of things you don't know about me, too, Miss Novak. You know, people - people seldom go to the trouble of scratching the surface of things to find the inward truth.

KLARA:

Really, Mr. Martin, I wouldn't care at all to scratch your surface. Probably because I know exactly what I'd find. A handbag instead of a heart, a suitcase instead of a soul. Instead of an intellect, a cigarette lighter - that doesn't work.

MARTIN:

Hm! Yeah, that - that - that's very well put. Comparing my intellect with a cigarette lighter that doesn't work, that's - that's - a very interesting mixture of poetry and meanness.

KLARA:

Meanness?

MARTIN:

Oh, now, now, don't - don't misunderstand, Miss Novak.

KLARA:

(SHARP) I thought I told you I was expecting somebody.

MARTIN:

Listen. Listen, if your party doesn't show up, wouldn't I--?

KLARA:

Oh, don't worry about that, Mr. Martin. My party will show up. It's really not necessary for you to entertain me.

MARTIN:

Well, let me tell you something, Miss Novak. You may have beautiful thoughts, but you certainly hide them, and as far as your actions are concerned, you're cold and snippy like an old maid and you're gonna have a terrible time finding a man to fall in love with you.

KLARA:

I? An old maid? (LAUGHS) No man will fall in love with me? Really, Mr. Martin, you're getting funnier every minute. Why, I could show you letters that would open your eyes. No, maybe not. You probably wouldn't understand what's in them. They're written by a type of man so far above you that it's ridiculous. Hah! I have to laugh when I think of you calling me an old maid. You! You little insignificant clerk!

MUSIC:

FOR A FINISH

SOUND:

APPLAUSE ... THEN OUT

HOST:

And so ends Act One of our first Gulf production of the season. During the brief moment before the curtain rises on Act Two, I'd like to tell you some of the many things in store for you here in the Gulf Theater. Next week, for instance, you'll meet Clark Gable, Ann Sothern and Jeffrey Lynn in the great motion picture success, "Red Dust." The following week, the pair you've all been waiting for, Vivien Leigh and Laurence Olivier in "Private Lives." In future weeks, among others, you'll hear from Jack Benny, Claudette Colbert, Ernst Lubitsch, Basil Rathbone, James Cagney, Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland.

And now, I know you'd like to hear a word about the man who's really behind the Gulf Theater, your neighborhood Good Gulf Dealer. He hopes you'll be listening in every week. And he hopes, too, that you'll take advantage of all he can do to give you more miles of motoring satisfaction. He's ready with that helpful Gulf service and with those splendid Gulf products, Gulf gasolines, and Gulf motor oils. Next time you're out driving, stop in at the sign of the Gulf orange disk and meet your neighborhood Good Gulf dealer.

MUSIC:

AN INTRODUCTION FOR ACT TWO "A FINE ROMANCE" ... THEN IN BG

HOST:

And now we return to the second chapter of our story, "The Shop Around the Corner," starring Margaret Sullavan, James Stewart, Frank Morgan, Oscar Bradley's music, with Frank Tours conducting.

MATUSCHEK:

Well, thank you, Mr. Pryor, I'll take over from here. It, uh, it was a terrible blow to Martin when he looked in the window of the café and discovered the unknown girl he'd been writing to for so many weeks was none other than his fellow clerk Klara. But it was more of a blow to Klara when, after Martin left, she waited two hours and that her dream prince didn't show up. She took it hard, poor child. You, uh, you know how girls are. Especially the dreamer type like Klara. Why, uh, I once knew a girl, before I was married, that, uh-- Yes, well, that - that's another story. Another program. Klara, as I say, took it very hard. She even stayed home from work, she was so upset. Martin felt pretty bad about this so he decided he ought to call on her -- strictly in the line of duty, of course.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE "A FINE ROMANCE" ... THEN OUT

SOUND:

KNOCK ON DOOR

MATUSCHEK:

Yes, uh, incidentally, whenever your hear that particular rapping on that particular door, ladies and gentlemen, that means Mr. Martin is calling on Miss Novak.

SOUND:

DOOR OPENS

MARTIN:

(CORDIAL) Well, good evening, Miss Novak.

KLARA:

(SLEEPY) Oh, good evening, Mr. Martin. Come in?

MARTIN:

Thank you.

SOUND:

DOOR CLOSES

MARTIN:

How are you, young lady?

KLARA:

I'm all right, Mr. Martin. Sorry I couldn't come to work.

MARTIN:

Oh, that's all right. Now you must take care of yourself.

KLARA:

I'm sure I'll be all right in a day or two.

MARTIN:

But that doesn't mean that you should neglect yourself. Now, you see, I feel pretty responsible for the whole thing.

KLARA:

You? Ohhh, no, Mr. Martin. Oh, no, I think I can relieve your mind; it wasn't your fault at all. (SIGHS) No, there's a - much bigger reason, unfortunately. A - psychological reason. But it's my personal problem and I'll come out of it. It's just one of those things.

MARTIN:

Oh, I'm very sorry. That's really a shame that you have to go through all this. But of course so long as it's only psychological--

KLARA:

Only psychological? Mr. Martin, it's true we are in the same room but we are not in the same planet.

MARTIN:

Miss Novak, I-- Although I'm the victim of your remark, I - I must admire your exquisite way of expressing yourself. You, uh, certainly know how to put a man in his planet.

SOUND:

KNOCK AT DOOR

KLARA:

Yes? Come in!

SOUND:

DOOR OPENS

ANNA (APPROACHES) Here, Klara. A special delivery letter has just come for you.

KLARA:

Oh, really? Thank you, Aunt Anna.

ANNA (MOVES OFF) I hope its good news.

SOUND:

DOOR CLOSES

KLARA:

(SIGHS) Well, Mr. Martin, it certainly was kind of you to drop in but I - I don't want to spoil your evening.

MARTIN:

Oh, no, I have lots of time. You go right ahead with your letter. Don't pay no attention to me.

KLARA:

Well, if you don't mind.

SOUND:

ENVELOPE TORN OPEN, LETTER UNFOLDED

KLARA:

(READS LETTER WITH RELIEF) Ah.

MARTIN:

It's good news?

KLARA:

Ah. Wonderful news, Mr. Martin. You know, if I weren't feeling so wonderful right now, I could be very mad with you.

MARTIN:

With me? Why?

KLARA:

Why? Because you really spoiled my date the other night. I wasn't so wrong when I asked you not to sit down at my table. You see, this gentleman did come to the café; he looked in the window, saw us together and he misunderstood.

MARTIN:

Oh, you mean - you mean, he thought you and I were - friends?

KLARA:

Yeah, he must have. Listen to what he writes. (READS) "Tell me, who is this very attractive young man? He's - he's just the type women fall for." (CHUCKLES)

MARTIN:

(CHUCKLES) Sorry I caused you so much trouble.

KLARA:

I'll straighten it out. Let him feel a little jealous. It won't hurt him.

MARTIN:

Mm hm. (SLY) Doesn't seem to be much of a man, this friend of yours. He walks away; he's afraid to come over to the table because another man's sitting there--

KLARA:

(ANNOYED) Mr. Martin! He was not afraid, I can assure you. He's tactful. He's sensitive. He's not the kind of a man who would sit at a table uninvited.

MARTIN:

Really?

KLARA:

It's difficult to explain a man like him to a man like you. Where you would say "black," he would say "white." Where you would say "ugly," he says "beautiful." And where you would say "old maid," he says-- Listen. Here. (READS, INCREASINGLY EMOTIONAL) Uh, "eyes that sparkle with fire and mystery."

MARTIN:

Oh.

KLARA:

(READS) "Vivacious."

MARTIN:

Mm hm.

KLARA:

(READS) "Fascinating."

MARTIN:

Mmm.

KLARA:

(SIGHS) He says I make him think of gypsy music. (CHUCKLES)

MARTIN:

(CHUCKLES) Well, I suppose there's nothing left for me to say except that I wish you a very merry Christmas. Both of you.

KLARA:

Thank you, Mr. Martin.

MARTIN:

Well, good night, Miss Novak.

KLARA:

Good night, Mr. Martin.

MUSIC:

BRIDGE "A FINE ROMANCE" ... THEN IN BG, THEN OUT AT [X]

MATUSCHEK:

Well, Klara showed up for work, all right, and worked like fury. She told everybody, including Martin and me, that she had an engagement for dinner on Christmas Eve and she was all excited about it. [X] Well, when the shop closed after a record-breaking day before Christmas, only Klara and Martin were left.

MARTIN:

Oh, uh, before you go, Miss Novak, eh, you want to see something?

KLARA:

Hm?

MARTIN:

Look. Look. How do you like this gold locket?

KLARA:

Oh, that's beautiful.

MARTIN:

Yeah. Well, why don't you try it on? I'd sort of like to see what it looks like on a girl.

KLARA:

I didn't know you had a girlfriend.

MARTIN:

Oh, yes, yes, I-- Probably not easy for you to imagine that somebody would like a man my type, but--

KLARA:

Oh, Mr. Martin. Don't let's start all over again. It's Christmas and I'd like to be friends with you. Listen. Do you mind if I tell you something?

MARTIN:

No, no, not at all.

KLARA:

When I first started to work here-- You know, something very strange happened to me. I found myself looking at you again and again. I just couldn't take my eyes off you.

MARTIN:

Really?

KLARA:

Mm hm. All the time I was saying to myself, "Klara Novak, what's the matter with you? Mr. Martin is not a particularly attractive man." I hope you don't mind.

MARTIN:

No, no, no, not at all.

KLARA:

And, listen, now comes a paradox. I caught myself falling for you.

MARTIN:

I can't believe it.

KLARA:

Yes, Mr. Martin. In those first few weeks-- Well, there were moments when you could have swept me off my feet.

MARTIN:

There were?

KLARA:

Yes. Well, you see, really, I was a different girl then. I was rather naive. All my knowledge came from books and I'd just read a novel about an actress who, when she wanted to arouse a man's interest, she treated him like a dog.

MARTIN:

Oh, that's true. You treated me like a dog, all right.

KLARA:

Yes, but instead of licking my hand, you barked.

MARTIN:

Oh, well. Well, that's all forgotten now, isn't it?

KLARA:

Oh, well, and now you go to see your girlfriend. By the way, is it serious?

MARTIN:

Yes. Yes, very.

KLARA:

Oh, we might both be engaged Monday morning?

MARTIN:

I think we will.

KLARA:

Oh, I - I don't want you to misunderstand. In my case, I just say it might happen. You see, he's coming to my house tonight to see me at eight o'clock.

MARTIN:

As a matter of fact, I can tell you that it will happen.

KLARA:

What? How do you know?

MARTIN:

Oh, I - I won't go into that.

KLARA:

Mr. Martin! What do you mean it will happen?

MARTIN:

Well, I, eh, I might just as well tell you. He came to see me.

KLARA:

Who?

MARTIN:

Well, your fiancé. He came last night.

KLARA:

(DISBELIEF) What?

MARTIN:

Now you shouldn't have told him who I am. You see, I spent a very uncomfortable hour. He apparently didn't believe it when you wrote him that I meant nothing to you, you see.

KLARA:

I can't get it into my head. Coming, to see you? Oh, no. That doesn't sound like him at all.

MARTIN:

Oh, no, but I - I straightened everything out. It's all right. Now, don't worry. In a little while, you'll be Mrs. Popkin.

KLARA:

Mrs. Popkin?!

MARTIN:

Popkin? Why, wasn't that his name? Popkin? I thought that-- That's what he told me.

KLARA:

Oh, Popkin. Oh, yes, yes, that's right. Popkin.

MARTIN:

And a very nice fellow. Very nice. I congratulate you.

KLARA:

Yes, thank you. I - I think he's a very attractive man, don't you?

MARTIN:

Oh, yes. Oh, yes. For his type, I would say - yes. Yes.

KLARA:

Would you - really - classify him as a - a definite type?

MARTIN:

Absolutely. And don't you try and change him, now. Don't put him on a diet. Don't--

KLARA:

Would you call him - fat?

MARTIN:

Well, that's a matter of opinion. Now, if - if I were a girl and had to choose between a young, good-for-nothing with lots of hair and a fine, solid, mature citizen, I'd pick Mathias Popkin every time.

KLARA:

But he has a fine mind, don't you think? Didn't he impress you as being rather witty?

MARTIN:

Mmmmmm, well ... I don't-- He, uh, struck me as being sort of depressed. But, of course, it's unfair to judge a man who's out of a job.

KLARA:

Out of a job?! Why, he never told me.

MARTIN:

Well, that shows how sensitive he is. But don't worry. Now, he feels that both of you can live very nicely on - your salary.

KLARA:

This is terrible! Oh, I'm outraged. I never dreamed he was - materialistic like this. If you could read his letters, such ideals. Why, I could quote you passages. "To love is - is to be two and yet one. A man and a ..."

MARTIN:

(OVERLAPS) "... a man and a woman blended as angels, Heaven itself."

KLARA:

How did you know that?

MARTIN:

That's by Victor Hugo. He stole that.

KLARA:

(READY TO CRY) Oh! Oh, no! I thought I was the inspiration of all those beautiful thoughts. Now I find he was just copying the words out of book. He probably didn't mean a single one of them.

MARTIN:

Oh, I'm sorry you feel this way. I - I hate to think I spoiled your Christmas.

KLARA:

That's all right. I - guess I really ought to thank you. Well, I guess I'd better be going.

MARTIN:

Oh, Klara, if I'd known in the beginning how you really felt about me, things would have been different. You know what I wish would happen? When your bell rings at eight o'clock tonight, and you open the door, instead of Popkin, I come in.

KLARA:

It's very sweet of you to try to cheer me up, but I think we better say good night. You have an engagement. Yes, and so have I. And we shouldn't be late.

MUSIC:

SOMBER BRIDGE "A FINE ROMANCE" ... THEN IN BG

SOUND:

CLOCK CHIMES

KLARA:

(SOBBING)

SOUND:

KNOCK AT DOOR

KLARA:

(SOBBING) Please go away, Mr. Popkin.

SOUND:

KNOCK AT DOOR

KLARA:

(RESIGNED) Oh.

SOUND:

FOOTSTEPS TO DOOR, WHICH OPENS

MUSIC:

AN ACCENT, THEN "A FINE ROMANCE" IN BG

KLARA:

You! What are you doing here?

MARTIN:

Popkin's right on time.

KLARA:

He's not here yet and I'll thank you not to joke about it.

MARTIN:

Klara. Klara, couldn't I take his place?

KLARA:

Please, you're only making it more difficult for me.

MARTIN:

Oh, Klara, my darling.

KLARA:

Oh, no, you mustn't put your arms around me.

MARTIN:

Dearest, sweetest Klara. I can't stand it any longer. Please take your key ...

KLARA:

Please--

MARTIN:

... open Post Office Box Two-thirty-seven ...

KLARA:

No.

MARTIN:

... and take me out of my envelope ...

KLARA:

Really--

MARTIN:

... and kiss me.

KLARA:

You mustn't-- (REALIZES) Box Two-thirty-seven?

MARTIN:

Dear Friend.

KLARA:

You! Dear Friend?

MARTIN:

Oh, my darling.

KLARA:

(EMOTIONAL) Mr. Popkin? Dear Mr. Popkin!

MUSIC:

A ROMANTIC ACCENT, THEN IN BG

MATUSCHEK:

Yeah, well. That's about the size of it. Of course, they got married. They're very happy now, those two. (CLEARS THROAT, BEGINS SPIEL) And, uh, now! If you should ever need some very fine leather goods or anything in the novelty line--!

MUSIC:

TOPS HIM FOR A FINISH

SOUND:

APPLAUSE ... THEN OUT

HOST:

Thank you, Margaret Sullavan, James Stewart, and Frank Morgan for a really grand performance. And thank you, too, Norman Corwin, for your swell radio adaptation. And now, on with the show. You know, I--

ANNOUNCER:

Roger? Er, Roger?

HOST:

Yes? Yes?

ANNOUNCER:

Remember me?

HOST:

Oh, I'm sorry, Bud. I almost forgot to introduce you. Ladies and gentlemen, meet our new Gulf Theater announcer, Bud Hiestand.

SOUND:

APPLAUSE ... THEN OUT

STEWART:

Say, uh, say, haven't I seen you in pictures, Bud? Your face is familiar.

ANNOUNCER:

Well, I - I have done some work, Jimmy, but I'm usually just the face on the cutting room floor.

MORGAN:

Oh, yes? Well, don't fret, young man, we all start that way. Eh, I can remember when I first started in pictures. I was-- (CHUCKLES) Yes, but that's another story. Besides it's so glamorous, I can sell it. Why give it away? So uh, you want to be an actor? Well, heh, heh, I'm just the man to help you.

ANNOUNCER:

Well, gee, that's swell, Mr. Morgan. Eh, right now, however, I'm busy learning to be an authority on gas.

MORGAN:

Gas?! Well, I know enough about gas to fill a balloon. Eh, what?

ANNOUNCER:

Gasolines, Mr. Morgan. For instance, I've been finding out about the new Gulf gasolines: Good Gulf and Gulf No-Knocks. And I learned that they've both been stepped up. Stepped up to give you faster pickup, more power, and a sweeter running, quieter engine. And, boy, if you've never tried the new Gulf gasolines, you don't know what you're missing. See if you don't notice a real difference the very first time you step on the accelerator. If you use a regular gasoline, try Good Gulf. If you prefer a premium fuel, try Gulf No-Knocks, the gasoline that is knock-proof under all normal driving conditions. Remember, you get either one at the sign of the Gulf orange disk. Drive in and fill up with America's stepped-up gasolines, the new Gulf gasolines.

MUSIC:

THEME ... THEN IN BG

HOST:

Next week, the stars of the Gulf Theater are Clark Gable, Ann Sothern and Jeffrey Lynn. What happens to them on a rubber plantation in Indo-China is the dramatic story of "Red Dust." We hope you'll all be listening to the Gulf Theater next week, starring Clark Gable, Ann Sothern, Jeffrey Lynn, Oscar Bradley's Gulf Orchestra, with Frank Tours conducting. Until then, this is Roger Pryor saying good night, everybody, for your neighborhood Good Gulf dealer.

ANNOUNCER:

Margaret Sullavan is currently working in the Loew-Lewin production of "Flotsam." James Stewart and Frank Morgan appear through the courtesy of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer.

SOUND:

APPLAUSE, IN BG

ANNOUNCER:

Jimmy's latest picture is "Philadelphia Story" and Frank Morgan will soon be seen in "Hullabaloo." This is the Columbia Broadcasting System.